Half A Century Reflections- another trip around the sun

While admittedely, I spend quite a bit of time reflecting on the past, contemplate the present and consider the future, I find these reflections constantly changing like a turn of a kaleidoscope altering my paradigms.

I suppose when one reaches a certain age, questions posed by others vary slightly when discussing birthdays and milestones.  I've had a few people as of late, ask me what is something I would do if I could.

It inevitably leads to a conversation about my 50/50 list.  While I did complete the list, it did go through various edits and updates with a few items still on my bucket list that were not likely to happen before the impending deadline as it approached.

In order to create this list of 50 things to do before reaching a major life milestone (the half a century mark), I spent more time reflecting over the years and took the opportunity to take inventory and review of my life.  This was not always a pretty picture.

While I don’t currently find myself sharing my life with anyone special outside of my children, my sisters, my brother, my parents and extended family of nieces and nephews, I spent a good deal of those years in a marriage, raising a family, having a career in hospitality, with little left for my own interests. 

Life gets busy and we all get caught in the daily routines our lives take on and before we know it the most important relationship we will ever have in our life is lost.  The one with ourselves.  This relationship can be the most difficult one to cultivate as we usually set aside our own needs for the needs of others, but if we get to know ourselves, it can give us the advantage of being able to find those with whom we want to share ourselves with as well as find comfort in being alone.  It was only in this last decade that I even looked inside myself and found parts of myself that brought me joy.  For those that may read this, I hope it doesn't take you almost half a century to start building a relationship with yourself.

As I mature in year and see the semi centennial marker behind me, we will see if I can march forward into another decade and overcome fears that still need to be faced, expand horizons that have yet to be explored, and continue to challenge myself and learn, while building a better relationship with myself, so that I can become the person I wish to be for myself as well as others.

Reminder - each day is a journey as we strive to be the change we want to see in the world.  Create a life by design. Enjoy each trip around the sun.

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